"Carl Jung called it the shadow. After each night
with either of you I loosened its drawstring, considered
your complaints, added to its bulk, denying myself
those attitudes, denying you the satisfaction
of knowing I tried to change. Now that I’m alone
again I find myself reaching in, this time
removing those bright spheres of embryonic
behavior for reconsideration, my shadow
now with new textures: a hole from you, the first,
you lioness — in and out, apathetic to the damage;
and new thread sewn along the seam from you,
lover, most recent — careful, but still irreverent.
You’ve both been rummaging — no wonder I forget
my purpose between the bedroom and the kitchen;
no wonder I fall asleep so quickly; no wonder
I was sixteen yesterday and twenty-six today;
no doubt I’ll soon be demential, morphine-blunted,
peaceful. Lioness, continue the hunt.
All the things you prey on, now, are only liabilities.
The shadow is a carnivore. Lover, even married
we’d still be less than one whole person"

— “Apologia For My Shadow,” Andrew P. Dillon (via clavicola)

Posted 1 month ago with 72 notes
Tags: Poetry  

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